6☆ Date with Sariel - Reunions Life After Life (生生团圆) | Light and Night 光与夜之恋
Please consider going through these event video recordings (with subs!) for the context of this card.
#1 霜雪庭园 | #2 集市寻芳 | #3 窗纸贴花 | #4 明灯映蕊 | #5 又至赏花时
Card Recording:
As a way to repay my hard work for decorating the winter garden, when Sariel asked about it, I asked for a full leisure day from him.
It's already past the first half of the first lunar month, but the bustling atmosphere around us has yet to dissipate - or should I say, I still don't wish to see it dissipate.
Hence here I am, appearing right here with a full set of "tools and equipment".
Holding the bright red yarn hat on my head, I extended an arm to press on the door bell that I can not get even more familiar with. Though after pressing a few times, it didn't ring at all.
You: Is the doorbell broken? Forget it, I'll knock.
Creak-- Before my knuckles touch the doorframe, the door has already opened a little.
You: Why is the door open?
Is Sariel purposely leaving it open for me because he's worried that he can't hear me knocking?
If it were usual times, I'd probably yell "I'm here!" loudly, then change into slippers to look for Sariel's whereabouts.
However, not today. I took out the brown box from my bag, holding it carefully, and knocked the door again.
No answer. So I knocked again.
Another knock.
Again with another knock--
This time, before I'm done knocking, sounds of nimble footsteps are already heard, gradually coming closer, and getting even closer.
The door is opened. And just as I've expected, the beautiful face is frowning slightly.
Sariel: If the door isn't closed, it means you can--
You: Sariel, happy new year!
Sariel didn't manage to finish his sentence. Because the moment I saw him, I have already opened the paper box's seal, and mindlessly poured its content all over the ground.
In an instant, crackling sounds filled our surroundings. Sariel's golden pupils widened, as if he was shocked.
After the noise have passed, the air lingers a faint smell of ash. He lets out a sigh.
Sariel: What is this?
You: New year blessing, of course.
Sariel: I'm talking about the thing in your hand.
You: Ah, these are bang snaps*.
*T/N: I'm not sure if this is available outside Asian countries, but bang snaps are a type of small novelty firework sold as a trick noisemaker. It's probably sold under the brand Pop Pop or something in SEA. We throw it to the ground to make it pop.
You: I think you definitely would dislike having smokes everywhere, so I used bang snaps to replace firecrackers.
I raised the box to him, blinking my eyes as I looked at him with full of anticipation.
You: It's now your turn to give me blessings.
Sariel: The festival is long over. Also you can't possibly have had amnesia that you forgot the number of times you've delivered new year blessings can you?
You: The ancient sayings are wonderful, it's new year as long as it's still the first month. As long as it's new year, there should be blessings every day, this is common sense.
Sariel: So I'm someone with no common sense?
You: Eh?
I absolutely did not expect this answer from him, that I am suddenly at loss of words.
You: Uh, that's not what I mean either.
Just when I was looking for the appropriate words, an almost nonexistent chuckle is heard from above. Looking at Sariel's face when I've returned to my senses, it looks like there's a sliver of... mischievousness?
You: Are you smiling?
Sariel: No.
You: Then--
Sariel: Happy new year.
It's now my turn being unable to finish my sentence. But no matter how he denies it, the smile in his clear voice can't lie to anyone.
Sariel: What are you laughing so silly about? Satisfied now?
I quickly toned down my expressions that I didn't even realize I was making, and nodded heavily.
You: Yeah, I can't be anymore satisfied!
Sariel: Then stop standing there like the entrance guardian, hurry and come in.
You: Coming coming!
When I lifted my leg, I suddenly noticed that there are still a few unexploded bang snaps, so I tugged Sariel.
You: I've heard this from my grandma, that the more complete the crackers are popped in new year, the better our entire year's luck will become. There are still a few left, how about we step on them together?
Lowering my head, my gaze moved towards Sariel's indoor slippers, and suddenly I feel like there's no way I could convince him in this.
You: Uh, with your flawlessly clean indoor slippers...
Sariel: So you know about that too, huh.
Though saying so, he have instead not showing any forms of struggles, and reached his leg out.
A person in the door, with another person outside; A pair of round-headed brown leather shoes, and a pair of snowy white slippers, almost stepping at the same time, the cracker sounded crisp and clear.
Sariel's originally clean shoe is now stained with a small piece of dust.
It's still the same as usual upon entering the door. The winter sunlight still pours onto the wooden flooring through the French windows. The radio in the living room is still on, with fragments of words and music faintly wafting here.
Different from the past, the flower lanterns, red lanterns and auspicious plants are within my eye's reach. It wasn't even looking so messily jolly even on lunar new year's eve.
Sariel: This is for you.
Sariel took out an envelope-like item from his casual outfit, gesturing me to take it.
You: Is this... a letter?
Sariel: It's a red packet.
You: Red packet? But haven't you sent me many red packets before this*?
*T/N: Traditionally, during Lunar New Year/ Chinese New Year, it's common for working adults/ married adults (depending on where you are from) to give out red packets to younger people. The red packets can come in different forms, but the packaging are traditionally red. It came from an origin to ward off demons for children until a monster called Nian is defeated. However, as technology advances, it's already common to send red packets through electronic wallet through WeChat or other e-wallet applications. Throughout the new year event in L&N, all MLs have sent quite an amount of red packets haha.
Sariel: Any day throughout the new year can be a day of distributing red packets, this is common sense.
You: You're copying me!
Sariel: Give it back if you don't want it.
Sariel opened his palm before me, looking like he's really going to take it back.
You: How could that be possible?! I have never received this type of "red packet"!
Curling those slender fingers back to his palm, I turned around and opened the envelope as if I'm protecting my food.
It's first a paper note with golden edges, having types of birds and floral veins drawn on its surface, and on its back lies Sariel's handwriting, writing "may everything go as you wish".
You: Sariel's handwriting are really pretty.
What follows is a wooden pendant. The pendant exudes a faint fragrance, tied with red rope, in an oval shape, with a few neat carved marks on it.
The scene isn't rich, that it doesn't smell like it is coming from a certain type of flower or grass, but it feels really soothing and reassuring upon sniffing it.
You: These marks are...
Giving it a touch using my fingertip, a slightly numbing feeling surges up, as if there's a flow of energy spreading all over my body that is incomparably warm and comfortable.
You: Wow!
Sariel: What are you wowing for? Disappointed that it isn't money inside?
You: That's not it, I was wowing that this is much better than money. But why is it called red packet? It is actually completely different no?
Sariel: There aren't any special reasons. There are many customs that the Erdas have learnt from humans, this is just one of them. But money is useless to Erdas at most of the time, and it's incomparable to a good night sleep amidst the sounds of firecrackers.
You: No wonder I feel sleepy after touching this pendant.
Sariel glanced at me helplessly.
Sariel: Before you, I never knew its effectiveness was this immediate.
You: Haha, really? It's a pity that the loudest times of firecracker sounds has already passed.
Sariel: I don't think I've seen you wanting to sleep early even at the times where the sounds of firecrackers were the loudest.
You: Uh... Well it's a holiday after all...
Sariel: Hence I'm giving it to you now. So a certain someone wouldn't scream about her anxiousness in her Moments* in the middle of the night because can't draw her draft. This item is infused with spiritual powers, so place it by your side if you wanted to calm down, it'll work for a couple of years.
*T/N: Consider it like your Timeline on Twitter or SNS, Moments is a timelines function in L&N.
You: Infused with spiritual powers? Your spiritual powers?
Sariel then threw a gaze that says "whose else could it be?".
You: The pendant has Sariel's spiritual powers...
After knowing this, the touch from my fingertips seems to feel different now.
Where exactly does it feel different? I don't quite know about it either. It's just like a feeling of happiness being overpowered by an happier feeling, it's very hard to describe it.
After emptying my thoughts for a second, as my mind wanders, the sound of the radio program suddenly became clear.
Radio: The season program recap... Mr. Gao and Ms. Zhang's little family have clearly displayed the differences between Northern and Southern of the country...
MC: Indeed... quite a big difference.
Radio: Then they subconsciously combined the two together...
You: Mhm mhm.
Radio: Whether it's eating ricecakes or dumplings, as long as two hearts are together, it's the most peaceful and happiest new year. We also wish for this pair of husband and wife--
You: Wow!
The incredible keyword pulled me back to reality. I covered my face in reflex, and the touch feels warm.
Sariel: What are you wowing at again?
You: Nothing.
I covered my face even more.
You: I was just feeling that the radio is talking for me.
Sariel (blushing): How baffling.
On the next second, to my surprise, I found Sariel's earlobes tinted with a layer of faint redness.
Could he also have heard the words from the radio?
In order to cover myself, I quickly lowered my head to simply dig things out from my bag, and took out the second box I prepared. Opening the cover, it's a thin golden necklace.
You: A- Anyway, I've also prepared this, it's just nice to use it as a gift in return. Golden accessories helps with boosting luck, and it can also ward off evil, it's a life necessity for returning to work after new year.
Sariel: I've never heard of anything like receiving a gift in return after giving out red packets.
You: It's a new tradition, don't mind it so much anymore.
I took out the accessory and placed it on Sariel's hand. The two-layered necklace opened as they encircled between his fingers.
You: How is it?
Sariel: ... It looks a little familiar.
This is pretty normal, the reason why it looks familiar is because of the current necklace Sariel is wearing. It's also the same two-layered necklace, and the same metal color.
You: I actually had many ideas, but I ended up making one based on the one you always wear.
Sariel: Why?
You: Because I was thinking that you'd be more willing to wear it if that's the case.
Sariel: What were your original ideas?
You: A bright red pendant with "Blessing" written on it... Golden thumb ring... A necklace as thick as a thumb...
Sariel's face darkens as I spill each of my ideas.
Sariel: You've at least managed to separate work from life.
You: I know those aren't aesthetics of a designer, but it's new year after all.
Rustle-- As we spoke, Sariel has already lowered his head and placed the original accessory onto the tea table. His eyelashes drooped, and his nimble fingers have already put on the necklace I gifted him around his neck.
Sariel: It is indeed not aesthetics of a designer. But I didn't say that I won't wear them.
I was still watching his movements, that it took me quite a while until I came back to my senses.
You: Wear... bright red word of "Blessing"? Golden thumb ring? Necklace as thick as a thumb?
Sariel coughed softly and averted his gaze.
Sariel: The bright red word of "Blessing" can be considered.
You: It's going to be exceptionally red, like really bright red.
Sariel: Could it be any redder than that silly hat on your head?
I touched my head. I actually forgot to take off the hat after entering the house for so long.
You: Yeah! Redder than this, isn't it very ceremonious?
Sariel: It's silly, and also ceremonious.
I imagined how Sariel looked while wearing a bright red "Blessing". Although it is almost unimaginable, but I have gotten myself a guarantee of it. Then next year--
Sariel: You can't possibly have started to plan about the next new year or are you?
You: How did you know?
Sariel: If you can actually manage to hide a secret, then you wouldn't have been a clumsy bird.
He softly pressed on the necklace complementing his white shirt. Each chain is gleaming under the sunlight.
Sariel: Don't think about it anymore. The one you made this year is... not bad.
I looked at him, stunned. Seeing his brows straightening, as if he's about to become angry. I quickly raised my arms at him.
You: If you like it, can I ask for a gift in return?
Sariel: If I didn't remember it wrongly, you've said that this was the gift in return for the red packet.
You: So I wanted the gift in return for the gift in return.
Sariel: So is there going to be a gift in return for the gift in return for the gift in return? Never ending.
You: This isn't called endless, this is to repay debts in kindness, it's a virtue that should be promoted.
Sariel sighed as if he's giving in.
Sariel: Fine, say it, what sort of weird ideas do you have again this time?
You: After decorating the courtyard, I noticed there were so many things that we should do in new year that we haven't do.
Sariel: So this was the reason why you released crackers at the entrance today?
You: Yeah, that is my teeny tiny part of my little new year wish. There are a few more left... Can I ask for your help to make it up for me, Mister Qi?
I looked at Sariel with some nervousness and anticipation, until he nodded lightly.
Sariel: I knew it wouldn't be a peaceful day today. Suit yourself.
[Choice: There are so much of new year activities, which should we start from...]
Calling: Watch TV program together
Intimacy: Clean the house together
Heartthrob 1: Make reunion dinner together
Heartthrob 2: Visit temple festival together
[Choice: Do Nothing]
Sariel has already been working hard on working days, and the meaning of new year holidays lies in leaving work aside and resting properly.
You: Actually, I just wanted to take a proper rest with you, just the two of us. You can do whatever you want, and you don't have to accommodate me too much.
Hearing so, Sariel has already made his move to the workshop. I quickly dragged him.
You: Anything but work!
Throughout the entire afternoon, we've been sitting on the sofa, each occupying a side.
I browsed at my phone aimlessly as I share interesting information to Sariel one by one. And he, on the other hand, is holding an incomprehensible ancient book, showing difficulties to bear with my ramblings.
After that, I fell asleep. By the time I woke up, I'm covered with a blanket, and it's already night outside.
Looking towards the other side of the soda, the book is stably placed on Sariel's knees. He is half supporting his cheek, eyes closed, with long and equal breaths.
I moved a little over, and wrapped us together in the blanket, softly leaning against his shoulder, and closed my eyes again.
[Calling: Watch TV program together]
The livelihood program we listened on the radio earlier still lingered by my ear. I glanced towards the TV beside me.
You: How about we watch some TV programs? I haven't been watching new year special programs for so many years*, I wonder what programs they have right now. In my memories this period of time should have many back-to-back broadcasts of crosstalk**...
*T/N: In case you're here without knowing MC's background, MC was a resident in Guang Qi until her late grandmother and mother passed away. And due to the reason of her not being legal age back then, her father brought her overseas so she has been overseas for many years, only to return to Guang Qi half a year ago in order to escape from an arranged marriage with Charlie (she didn't know Charlie back then).
**T/N: One of Sariel's hobbies - listening to crosstalk.
Sariel switched on the power supply without leaving any remarks.
The ceremonious songs sounded as expected. I sunk in the sofa, and stretched myself.
You: Life is so wonderful!
Sariel: Satisfied with just this?
You: Mhm mhm, but if I can watch the TV while eating snacks, it'd be even more satisfying. I understand this, for Director Qi to ask me this question, he is definitely wanting to fulfil this tiny wish of mine.
Sariel: It's because I knew you wouldn't give up on pestering me.
Though saying so, he still stood up.
Sariel: If the snacks and drinks were to be handed straight to your hand, it'd be even much more satisfying, right?
I nodded vigorously, and successfully received Sariel's eyeroll in annoyance and amusement in return.
Not long after, the bubbling sounds of tea boiling is heard from the kitchen. I listened in distraction as I paid attention to the TV program.
The acrobatics performance just ended, and now it's broadcasting a magic show. A famous magician is making the water in the cup flowing upwards, and there aren't any trickery or mechanisms around him.
The water flies around along his magic wand, even brushing past children's faces in the audience, that a drenched nose is left.
You: Are there really no principles behind this?
No, for such an exciting program, I should call Sariel to have a look too--
[Try calling him!]
[Mutter gibberish]
I didn't receive any replies after calling out for a few times, and the program is about to end.
I quickly stood up and dashed into the kitchen. And what a bad coincidence, I "bumped" right into Sariel, literally.
The steady strength encircled my arm. Looking up from the woven fabric with a scent of white sandalwood, I coincidentally see Sariel raising a big tea tray with only a single hand.
You: So impressive...
I can't help myself but to touch his arm. His flexible muscles are hidden under the narrow sleeves of his home wear.
Clang-- The originally stable tray suddenly shook a little.
You: I'm sorry! I- I'll help you to hold it!
After a series of business, the program is long ended...
[Call his name (Qi SiLi, in Chinese)]
After a while, Sariel carried a tray of tea, nuts and fruits out from the kitchen. The entire house is full of fragrance.
I no longer care about the program, and leaned closer in curiosity.
The teacup I'm used to using is made of transparent glass, with a head of a bird with a silly smile drawn on it.
The tea is clear that the bottom of the glass is seen, with stalks standing* within, the edges of the tea leaves are a little powdery white. Looks like it's a new species that Sariel nurtured himself.
*T/N: A stem standing upright in your tea is a lucky thing! If a single stalk comes to the top, it could mean a stranger will visit, or the arrival of a lover.
After taking a sip, it tastes mild and sweet, with a lingering aftertaste, seeping out a form of softness within.
Just when I was about to turn my head over to exclaim about the tea, I saw Sariel, still holding his teacup, but the liquid within is much darker.
You: Hm? Are we drinking different types of tea?
Sariel: No.
You: Then... what's the name of my tea called?
Sariel took a glance at my teacup.
Sariel: Clumsy Bird's Return to Forest.
You: Clumsy bird's... return to forest? What does this name have to do with this cup of tea--
Before I can finish my words, right under my gaze, the tea stalk that has fully absorbed water undulated casually, and finally laid down on the bottom of the cup as if it's matching with the conversation.
Sariel: The taste, the form, they are pretty similar to the clumsy bird,.
You (pouting): ...... Then what about yours? What is it called?
Sariel: None.
You: That won't do, let me name it for you!
I reached an arm out towards Sariel, and he looked at me in doubt.
You: Before that, I have to first give the taste a try.
Before he can suggest additional opinions, I took the cup from his hand, turned a side, and drink a mouthful of it.
You: Ugh!
My mouth is filled with rich bitterness. Sariel watched my expressions crumpled, that his expressions are saying "it's unbearable to watch".
Sariel: Now you know. Hurry and return it to me.
I raised an arm, and stopped him from handing me the "clumsy bird" teacup.
You: Mm mm mm, mm mm mm mm mm mm mm.
Wait a bit, let me savor a bit more. Though the words weren't told clearly, but Sariel seemed to have understood it.
Sariel (sighs): Suit yourself.
After swallowing the tea, I pursed my lips, and I've actually savored a different taste. The lingering taste gradually became clear, just like the snow waters melted by a fireplace.
I returned the cup to Sariel.
You: With this color... I know what to name it now, let's call it Fox Encounter in the Deep Forest, what do you think?
Sariel: So-so.
You: It was pretty witty alright...
Just when I was about to complain about his inattentive reply, I noticed Sariel spacing out at the cup.
Oh no, I can't possibly have left a mark of my lipstick there did I?
I quietly touched my lips. Thank goodness, I didn't apply any today.
After the alarm is disarmed, I relaxed and continued watching the TV program, and I wasn't able to notice Sariel's gaze.
Only the little bird outside the window saw this. The man with silvery white hair drooped his neck in hesitation, and gently placed his lips on the mark that has yet to dry out.
His eyes are rippling in gentleness, it feels like spring has arrived this house before it arrived this land.
[Call him by a nickname (or call him hubby/ wifey in Chinese)]
Sariel almost immediately walked out from the kitchen, frowning, but a faint layer of redness is seen across his ears.
Sariel: What are you simply addressing about?
You: Well didn't you answer me despite me addressing simply...
Seeing that he's about to return to the kitchen, I quickly tugged him.
You: Don't go don't go, hurry and review this program for me. This magic really has no traces of hidden mechanisms.
Sariel got dragged by me all the way to the TV, and gave it a brief look.
Sariel: There's no mechanics with this to begin with. He is an Erda that can control waters.
You: No wonder! This explains it all. It's really a blessed talent... so blessed...
I suddenly remembered that Sariel is also an industry professional that captures public attention, but it doesn't seem like Sariel's Talents are providing any obvious aids to designing.
You: Sariel, have you thought of this before...? If you were to be just like this magician to work around your Talent, who knows it might've been easier for your success?
Sariel: Success?
You: Well it's just like how you are right now.
Sariel stared at the TV screen, as if he is seriously thinking about it.
Sariel: If not a designer, what will you be?
You: Ah... I have actually never thought of this before. I've been wanting to be a designer since I was very little.
Sariel made a soft sound.
Sariel: So do you understand now?
You: Understand as in, you never thought of doing anything else too?
After receiving a silent acknowledgment, I tilted my head and thought about it, then showed him a big smile.
You: This is so wonderful.
Sariel: Wonderful in what terms?
You: This means that no matter in which world we are in, our choices will never change, and we will definitely encounter each other in this path. Just the thought of it itself is very reassuring.
With no response after a moment, I turned my head towards him.
You: Sariel?
A large hand gently touched my head. I seemed to have heard a very soft voice.
Sariel: It's the same for me.
[Intimacy: Clean the house together]
I have left a lot of traces of the bang snap paper and gunpowder, so I indeed feel a little embarrassed. Moreover, cleaning is also something common to do in the first lunar month.
You: How about we make a massive cleanup for the end of new year?
Sariel looked at me with a frown.
Sariel: Did your personality change?
You: I think not, I was also pretty proactive whenever I helped you to tidy your greenhouse and basement at usual times.
Sariel: Then what about tidying your own work desk? The fruit tea I gave you last year is still there, it's no longer consumable.
You: Uh... I was just too busy alright.
Back then, the two of us weren't too acquainted with each other, so I can't bear to finish the fruit tea Sariel gave me. After that, I can't bear to throw it away.
But right now, the food in this entire house, I can take them whenever I want--
With a slap, Sariel gently hit on my hand that is reaching out to the huge bag of candy on the table.
Sariel: Have you once again completely forgotten the fact that you had toothache from having too much candies not long ago?
Looks like this freedom still comes with restrictions.
After letting out an internal grievance, I willingly picked up the broom leaning against the corner of the wall to clean up the mess on the floor.
By the time I've returned, Sariel is washing a wiping cloth, looking very focused. The skin on his hand is slightly reddened, probably because of the touch of cold water.
With some strength used to twist the cloth dry, the streaks of redness over the joints of his fingers got even deeper.
You: Sariel, can you request for plants to help you with housework?
Sariel: ... It's indeed an idea that you'd have.
You: Are you saying that I'm good at adapting to the situation?
Sariel: I'm saying that you are good with ridiculous thoughts. Don't stand here if you're tired, just sit over there.
You (pouting): You can't possibly think I'm hinting that I wanted to rest are you?!
I puffed my cheeks, and felt deeply unsatisfied.
You (pouting): I was originally trying to say that since the plants aren't willing to help you, then I'll be of your service.
Sariel drapes the cloth by the edge of the basin, and perhaps hearing me speaking in a serious manner, he turned around seemingly interested as he watched my next move.
Sariel: Haven't you been helping me to begin with?
You: In another way.
I placed my hands that have been already warm from the exercise to my mouth, breathed some warm air into them, then rubbed them.
Then, I placed my hand onto Sariel's hand that is placed by the wooden rack--
[His hands look very cold, help him to warm them up a little]
[Outcome 1: Tap anywhere but his shoulder]
Tap on his hair: Is there ash on my head?
Tap on his shoulder: It's just cleaning, such exaggerated massages aren't needed.
Tap on his chest: The towel to dry your hands is over there, not here.
Tap on his abdomen: Understood, doing a disservice is also a form of service.
Tap anywhere on his pants: Is this the other way to repay me that you're talking about?
Clang-- The water basin on the rack almost flipped to the floor. Thank goodness for Sariel to catch it on time, but splashes are still inevitable, and the dirty water have drenched his sleeves.
I knew it's my fault, and immediately lowered my head.
You: I'm sorry, I was about to cheer for you and boost your morale.
Sariel lets out a helpless sigh.
Sariel: To cheer and boost morale is a synonym of troublemaking in your dictionary, understood.
You: Another chance, please? I promise to help you out properly.
A stained, light-colored smock fell into my arms. Sariel rolled up his inner clothing's sleeves.
Sariel: Then help me to place it to the side, then sit on the sofa.
You: Okay...
Leaning on the sofa as I watched Sariel at work. His arms looked very skinny, but the lines are good-looking.
I arched my back as I glided out to touch the floor, then glide myself back.
You: So impressive, it's really clean without a single speck of dust.
Sariel looked up and threw me a glance, with a gleam of mischief flashed past his eyes.
You: Hm?
Sariel: Orange.
After stunning, I snapped back to reality. Isn't Orange the stray cat we've gotten well-acquainted from feeding it under our office, the cat that always bathe itself under the sun as it hangs itself over the railing?
I scrunched my nose, and meowed at him.
Sariel is now the person that is stunned. After a moment, rustling sounds of footsteps are heard. I closed my eyes, awaiting for the descending of "feeding".
[Outcome 2: Tap anywhere but his shoulder]
Tap on his hand: ... It's very warm.
The clearly-defined bones fell into my palm. Due to the great difference being too obvious, the instant our skins stick together feels just like water poured onto burning metal, that I can't help myself but to let out a breath.
Sariel seems like he is also in shock, that his body stiffened.
Sariel: What kind of help is this?
You: Uhm... Your hands seemed cold, so I'm helping you to warm it?
Sariel: There are gloves at home. I'll get them if I feel cold.
Looking along his line of gaze, there is indeed a pair of rubber gloves hanging on the wall over the side. I smiled awkwardly.
You: Oh, right, then should I bring them over?
Just when I drew my hand back a little, it's pressed by the edge of another calloused palm.
One on top and another at the bottom, Sariel's hands faintly held mine, like a sloppy sandwich.
Sariel: No need.
You: Eh?
Sariel paused.
Sariel: ... I'm allergic to rubber.
You: Huh? Then why did you buy rubber gloves?
Sariel: For Lizard.
I looked at him with a doubtful gaze. Sariel averted his gaze a little, but his hands held mine a little tighter.
You: You're utilizing little Lizard too much...
I softly answered him, but I understand it, because I don't actually want to take the so-called rubber gloves either*.
*T/N: They wanted to hold hands... uwu
[Heartthrob 1: Make reunion dinner together]
When I was a child, I have always believed that for occasions of reunions like the eve of lunar new year, Chinese Lantern Festival, Mid-Autumn Festival, Winter Solstice, they should all have a scene where family and friends are gathered as they get busy in and out of the kitchen.
By the time I grew up, after work has gotten busy, and family members are gone, and only then I understood that reunions are only things that come by luck, and never something we can simply ask for.
You: Sariel, let's make a reunion dinner together, what do you think?
Sariel: I did tell you to suit yourself. What do you want to eat?
I have been coming here for free meals at usual times, and Sariel has always been the one cooking.
My culinary skills were never practiced, so it's barely useful even if I were to help him. I'd always get "invited" out of the kitchen, and was always forced to wait for my meal by the table.
This round, I have to look for a way to help him, otherwise the meaning to make reunion dinner "together" will be lost.
You: Hmm, how about we have some pastries? I can help you with kneading the flour and make patterns! I'm very good with those!
Sariel: Do you actually want to eat, or do you want to play?
You: I choose both!
Sariel showed an expression where he's long used to my nonsense, then turned around and walked towards the kitchen. I quickly followed suit.
You: Shall we first head out to buy ingredients? Glutinous rice, dried and candied fruits, brown and white sugar, there are a lot of things we will be needing.
Sariel: What kind of pastry would these materials of yours make?
You: Actually I have yet to think about it properly, but I feel like we'll be using these...
Sariel scoffed softly, unsure if in agreement or disdain, and opened a few pieces of thin, checker-patterned cloths.
Only then, there are a few rattan-weaved vegetable baskets covered underneath. Bags of ingredients are placed within the baskets, and everything I mentioned earlier were all complete, or even oversupplied.
You: Red beans, green beans, peanuts, dried potatoes... You can't possibly have guessed that I would be planning to make desserts didn't you...
A glare flew out from the pair of golden pupils.
Sariel: How could that be possible? I've bought extra a long time ago.
You: True, things like red beans can be stored for a very long time.
My gaze moved towards a corner of the kitchen, but there are also a few more extra large bags, with a few coronaria, garlic and bamboo shoots casually popping out from its top, even carrying fresh dews.
You: Hey, did you buy these a long time ago too?
Sariel: Obviously.
Sariel glanced at me, then turned away. This is clearly an obvious lie, so I pursed my lips, trying my best to not burst out in laughter.
Sariel: What?
You: Thank you, Sariel, for making so much preparations.
Has he always been this well-prepared for each time since the past? I wouldn't know, because I rarely have my chances to be in the kitchen with him.
Splash-- Sariel twisted the water tap open.
Sariel: Hurry and bring them to me once you're done deciding on what to use.
You: No problem!
I fiddled the sack of round red beans, each and one of them are very full, their coldness rolling off from my fingertips, just like micro massages. Unable to resist the temptations, I straightened my entire palm, and buried it within.
You: Phew, so comfortable.
Sariel: How old are you this year?
You: Five? Six? I don't remember~ Big brother, do you want to give it a try too?
Sariel: No.
You: What a pity.
I pouted, acting as if I'm in grievance, but I don't actually mind it at all. Sariel's gaze stopped on my face for a while, as if he's battling with an internal struggle.
Sariel (Breathes out heavily, flustering): Five minutes.
Sariel spoke as his hand reaches out to the sack. The red beans rustled, that the top few means almost rolled out. With that in sight, I felt a sense of nervousness that came from nowhere.
Gradually, his palm has completely submerged within, only leaving part of his wrist on the outside. Even the few green veins have also disappeared from mu sight to somewhere unknown.
You: How is it? Isn't it very comfortable?
Sariel: Very packed.
You: The feeling of being squeezed is what exactly makes it enjoyable!
Sariel: Incomprehensible.
As if he's really not used to this, Sariel moved his fingers, and started a little wave in the depths of the sack.
You: Ah.
The back of both hands touched by accident. Still separated by the red beans, the touch was very light, but Sariel's slightly cold temperatures are still delivered very vividly.
Do I need to move? But he isn't moving much. With such a close distance, and with a slight move, this time, even our pinkies are stuck together.
You: This sack is a little small...
Sariel (smiling): ......
Five minutes has probably long passed, but Sariel hasn't moved away, as if he has turned into a statue. I dare not to look towards his side profile, only feeling tiny beads of sweat seeping out from my palms, and the temperature is also very high.
After that I could feel that even the tiny patch of skin on the back of his hand is also warmed by my hand.
I immediately pulled my hand out, and grabbed onto the enamel basin* on the side.
*T/N: The basin is very specifically called 搪瓷盆, it's probably something that is common in older generation Chinese homes, it looks like this.
You: I'll get the rice and wash the beans, you can get other stuff out for now.
Twisting the tap to its maximum, I can't help but to secretly glance towards Sariel. He's taking out the red beans "sticking" between his fingers out, one by one.
The preparation work are complete. The rough, sweet and sour fillings, and fruits of various colors are all ready, and the skies have also turned dark.
To accommodate to my request to make pastries while enjoying the scene, Sariel took out the table leaning against the backyard, and made it into our cooking table.
I just washed my hands. The hot waters from the winter are coming a little slow. Being impatient, my hand is now damp and cold.
Sariel is already seated in front of the table, coincidentally facing me with his back. The tall collar of his home wear has covered half of his slender neck, looking very warm.
Such a contrast is really filled with temptations.
You: A neck that is so suitable for a prank...
I tiptoed to approach closer, as I raised my cold hands up high. But suddenly, a question suddenly popped out from my mind.
You: ... Sariel wouldn't be angry, or would he?
Speaking of it, despite being acquainted to him for so long, I really have no clue about how far Sariel can accept pranks, and it is even more unimaginable to know the kind of response he would have.
Right on this second of hesitation, a water droplet dripped from my fingers. From my fingertip, until the soft white ends of his hair, then to the not-so-tightly-stuck collar--
Sariel: *hisses in cold*
You: Eek!
Sariel shivered, and turned around very quickly, with an expression of "what on earth are you doing?" written all over his face.
You: Uh, I saw your collar rolled in.
Sariel immediately reached his arm out to tidy it.
You: But! I noticed I've seen it wrongly. Everything's normal, everything's normal.
Sariel: You-- Forget it.
He lowered his head again. Looks like my bluff went through. I let out a sigh of relief, sat by Sariel's side, pluck out a piece of mixed flour, and began to seriously knead it.
I kneaded a fox-shaped one, then kneaded another in the shape of a bird. I dipped some water to stick black sesame onto the eye areas. Taking a closer look, they do seem to have taken their shapes.
Just when I was about to show them off to Sariel, but as soon as I looked up, I'm welcomed with the sight of intricate shapes.
There are flowers and birds, circles of spirals. They were clearly just dough, but they seemed like they are filled with life - flowers about to bloom, birds about to take flight, and the spirals seemingly flowing.
The thinnest part of the dough skin exudes the colors of its fillings, and each of them are different.
The plate over the edge looks like a white sugar osmanthus cake, printed with delicate patterns, but there aren't any mould laying around.
You: Is this something doable with human hands?
Sariel: If not made with hands, could it have been made with paws?
You: Paws... Fox kneading doughs...? Pfft.
This word brings out a unique feeling when it's coming from Sariel's mouth. However, right on that instant, Sariel warned me to stop my imaginations with his gaze.
Sariel: Just say it if you don't want to eat anymore.
You: Of course I'm eating. I'm saying, there are still differences between the hands of designers.
As I spoke, I hid my ugly little bird and little fox to the side, pretending that they have never existed, and focused to watch Sariel working on the doughs.
No matter what he does, Sariel's back is always upright, with his chin showing well-defined outlines.
His serious expression is something that I have seen many times, yet it's still something refreshing to see.
The bright and sharp gaze that usually looks at drafts of apparels, is now blurred by the sunset fog in the forests, revealing his gentleness.
The well-defined fingers caresses the dough, spreading the petals, even leaves have surfaced. With gentle kneads and pinches, unsure of why I would think of this, but who knows the omnipotent Sariel might actually know how to play a Pipa*.
*T/N: Chinese lute.
The little bird and little fox doughs hiding behind the jam bottle looked like they are peeking out in grievance. I can't bear to watch it, so I muttered quietly.
You: Well good-looking things are good-looking, but it's still the uglier ones that we can bear to consume. I've placed a lot of considerations, it's not because I can't make it.
Sariel: What are you muttering about?
You: Nothing. I was just thinking, you made so much, can we finish eating them?
Sariel: Weren't you the one that kept saying you wanted to try new things? Now that there's a chance, you've instead not wanting to try more anymore?
You: Of course I'd want to, thank you for your efforts, Master Qi.
I picked up a piece of osmanthus cake, it is almost a third of the size you can usually purchase from shops, and it's also the same for the other types of pastries.
Sariel: Also, there's something in this world called refrigerator.
You: I understand now~ But if we were to store the remaining ones, it will take you a very long time to finish them yourself. Lizard definitely wouldn't like them, so it can't help you.
Sariel: So?
You: So I'll come here for breakfast every day, so I can help you to eliminate them as soon as possible. What do you think?
Sariel: It's not like it's your first or second time here for free meals anyway.
You: There's also lunch, dinner, I can help you to eat them too. Of course, if there are two more additional dishes, it'd be even better.
Sariel: Resting a little after dinner, then have supper next, is that right?
You: Yeah yeah. While eating supper, we can also have night talks by the candlelight, and talk about design freely. On the next day, continue breakfast seamlessly.
I waved my hands, as if I'm really depicting some grand vision.
You: Until we're done with eating these pastries.
Sariel: Meaning you're staying over my place and not leaving?
You: Well yeah I guess?
Sariel did not answer me, only to massage his forehead, seemingly very much speechless.
Just when I placed my focus back to the dough, a very soft voice is heard.
Sariel: You can also come here even if they are finished.
With a swish, I looked up immediately.
You: Eh, are you saying-- Breakfast? Lunch? Dinner? Supper? Or is it the night talks by the candlelight?
Sariel: You're asking for the obvious.
You: So that means they are all okay?
Sariel: Mm.
I placed my face in my arms, almost unable to keep the smile and the heat on my face to myself.
The distance between Sariel and I, are really gradually getting closer. Even him himself seemed to have became much more direct.
Now that I recall it, how did I think of saying "night talks by the candlelight"? But the end result is too great, so great that there are so much of my concerns have all been tossed aside in that instant.
Feeling touched, I revealed an eye and looked towards Sariel.
The fine glutinous rice powders on my hands quietly fell on the table, making me to recall the water droplet and the unsuccessful prank earlier.
You: I just discovered a life philosophy.
Sariel: There's more than enough of your twisted logic.
You: This is definitely not one of those. I discovered that we can't be hesitant, and must be promptly decisive.
Sariel: Aren't you promptly decisive enoug--
I stood up, and just as he said, I raised my hand in a very "promptly decisive" manner, and smudged the white glutinous rice powder all over his face.
Sariel startled at his place, pastry still in his hand, but his movements froze.
His face is printed with four round fingerprints, from top to bottom, the arrangements are so appropriate that they have soothed out the slightly lifted corners of his eyes, his skinny face, and his sharp, thin lips.
The pair golden of pupils are already good-looking enough, that the light from his gaze dispersed into countless golden rays, as if they are pouring out. In contrast to the stiffness of his body, his eyes looked full of life.
I was originally a little nervous, but now I've instead relaxed, and faced his gaze directly.
The slender fingers moved a little, as if he's going to put the pastry aside to wipe his face off, but very quickly noticing that his hands are also full of flour, so it only going to make things worse.
You: Uh, Director Qi, do you need me to wipe your face for you?
Sariel's lips moved, he mouthed something.
"Childish".
You: Um, what an obvious response.
Sariel: Aren't you getting increasingly braver now?
You: I think I heard of this before too...
He stood up and was about to wash his hands, so I tugged his sleeve.
You: Hey, don't be in such a hurry.
The dough fox and the dough little bird are still peeking out, so I held the dough fox up to show it to Sariel. There are also four little round pits on the fox's face, it's the product of my failure in sticking the whiskers onto it.
You: Look, aren't the two of you very much alike?
Sariel: ......
You: Of course, you are still very, very much better looking than it, in overall terms.
An unconcealable smile flashed past Sariel's face. He very quickly lets out a light cough, and picked up the little bird on the side.
There's a big pit on the bird's head, it's because I originally intended to make a crown, but of course, I didn't manage to do that in the end.
Sariel: You're truly the embodiment of the "clumsy" in "clumsy bird".
He caressed that little pit, pinched off the powder on his fingers, and stared at it for a while. This expression is very familiar, with some hesitation, anticipation, and bits of nervousness.
So I proactively leaned closer towards him.
You: Don't be angry, how about I lend you my face so you can smudge on it too?
Sariel: I'm not angry.
You: I know. But, if you wanted to do it, then you should be promptly decisive.
Sariel (flustering): And you said it wasn't twisted logic.
In this quiet space, our breaths are both clearly audible. The slightly calloused fingertip drew a circle on my forehead, not too light, nor too heavy.
I too, imitated Sariel, and mouthed something.
You: Childish.
He seems to have long expected for this to happen, the expressions that has yet to dissipate in time carries a certain type of emotion that could be considered as his tenderness.
They can finally be placed into the wok. I sorted them based on their types, separating them by methods of cooking - steaming what should be steamed, cooking what should be cooked, and frying what should be fried. There are a few types left, but Sariel said there's no need to steam, cook nor fry them, and just leave them by a side.
You: Let's have three osmanthus cakes. Two purple balls, two white balls... Hm? Where did my bird and fox go?
Just when I was about to turn around to look for it, I noticed Sariel is tearing a piece of plastic wrap, and the two adorably ugly doughs are right in front of him.
I curiously watched him wrapping the two pieces of dough in layers as he placed them onto the wooden rack.
You: Aren't you going to steam these two?
Sariel paused.
Sariel: Are those not enough for your consumption? They can't be finished, I'll steam them next time.
You: When? I didn't make them well, don't eat them if they are stored for too long.
Sariel: You don't have to mind about it.
You: Oh... So you find them very adorable too, right? You placed them so high above.
Sariel: I think they are so ugly they can ward off evil.
Sounds of game's special effects sounded in my mind, I got K.O.ed by Sariel so effortlessly. With too much damage taken all of a sudden, I only recovered when the sweet scent wafted to my nose.
You: I knew they are indeed a little ugly... But you weren't even that direct when you're commenting my design drafts.
Sariel served the pastries to the table with two porcelain plates.
Sariel: This is also a prompt decision.
You: Sariel, could you actually be someone who bears grudge easily?
Otherwise, he is definitely a good prankster.
The little fox on the wooden rank, its tail seemed to be swaying proudly. I've been selecting here and there, finally picking up a white, spiral-shaped pastry as I took a bite with resentment.
It's soft, very soft, and it feels like it'd melt as soon as it enters the mouth, but is still retains the texture of a flour-based food. All of a sudden, a layered unique scent filled my nose.
Jasmine, sugar cane, basil, the refreshing bitterness from tea, each bit that my tongue tasted are of a different taste, yet each type has their distinct taste, even someone like me could differentiate them.
The final scent, is the scent of cheese and epiphyllum that lingered for a long time. I looked towards Sariel in surprise.
You: It's too delicious. What is it?
Sariel: Buttered spiral puff* with flour added.
*T/N: There's no official English translation here, but 酥油鲍螺 is a kind of sweets made with ghee that looks like a snail, it's considered a kind of pastry that melts in the mouth upon consumption.
You: Buttered spiral puff?
I can only faintly recall that this is an item made of dairy. It appeared in ancient novels, but it doesn't sound like it's a delicacy with such complicated flavor.
Moreover, the bottom scent of epiphyllum is just like it is printed with Sariel's label.
You: Did you invent this method of creation?
Sariel: Not completely.
You: Eh? Then did you learn it from a recipe?
Sariel: No recipes, I ate them in the past.
Knowing how to make it upon eating? That's too impressive. I let out an internal sigh, and quietly picked up another piece of pastry on the side.
This is a hot one, and the softness is immediately felt upon touch, with a variety of dried fruits on the pastry's surface. Upon bite, there are dried scents of pine nuts and walnuts, it's very sweet, but it's not sickening at all.
You: How did you make it... It has a very unique taste.
Sariel: Brown sugar and orange juice were used.
You: Brown sugar and orange juice?! Why did you think of this combination?
Sariel: I read it from the book.
You: Huh? Which book? I want to buy it to learn it too.
Sariel: It's already lost in time.
Sariel's answer was faint. He picked up a piece and placed it into his mouth, frowning for a moment, seemingly not quite satisfied with it.
You: It's lost in time huh...
A faint sentimental feeling surged. But--
You: I'm really blessed and happy, to be able to eat desserts that are lost in time.
As soon as my words dropped, Sariel's movements stopped. But this pause of movements seemed like a coincidence, he seemed like he just happened to be thinking about something, and lifted his head up slowly.
Sariel (eyes widened): What did you just say?
You: I said, I'm really blessed and happy, to be able to eat desserts that are lost in time. Moreover, it's you who made them.
Sariel did not speak, only his lashes trembled a little.
You: Sariel... Was there something wrong with what I said?
Sariel: Nothing. But these desserts aren't lost in time, it just happened that certain methods of making are no longer common.
You (pouting): Ah? What on earth!
So it was a word play!
The only way to extinguish my anger is to keep eating the pastries. I gave every pastry a try, and they are all things that I have never tasted. I showed them to Sariel, and it's either from the records of ancient books, or the methods of making were not passed down.
You: Could you possibly be able to learn anything by only watching once, or coincidentally able to eat them once or twice?
The mouthful of osmanthus cake that I just swallowed choked me in a somewhat uncomfortable manner. I asked my question in a direct manner, looked around, and wanted to look for a cup of water.
A glass coincidentally appeared by my hand, and there's hawthorn* soaked in the warm waters.
*T/N: Not sure about other cultures, but in Chinese cultures hawthorn waters are consumed after feeling bloated or eating too much, it's very relieving~
You: Thank you.
Sariel: No.
Just when I was gulping the waters down to my throat as I watched Sariel's expressions through the glass, I can't see him well. Until I'm done with drinking, I caught a sliver of hesitance from his gaze.
You: No what?
Sariel: Learning the methods of making them.
You: Then you--
Sariel: I spent a very long time, and I also requested for others' teachings.
You: Others?
Sariel: Someone said I can be a food connoisseur, but I am a chef with not much talent.
Someone actually called Sariel talentless?!
This is greatly contradicting with what I've known of, so I can't convince myself with it no matter what was being said.
You: Impossible. There must've been an error in judgment. Or perhaps, perhaps he's jealous of you, that he purposely belittled you.
Sariel: He wasn't wrong when he said this. The person that can't even knead doughs evenly from the beginning, is indeed not considered as someone with talent.
You: But you're clearly really good in cooking.
Sariel: Practice makes perfect. It works anywhere.
I suddenly became speechless. I have never heard Sariel mentioning his lacking, no, I should say that he is already proficient in everything when we met to begin with.
But the tone he spoke, it wasn't humble, nor there were any resentments, but have instead carried a certain emotions of nostalgia.
You: I really hoped for this "somebody" to try your current dishes and desserts.
Sariel (smiling): You seemed like you are even more unwilling to admit it than I do.
You: Of course! You are my mentor that I admire the most after all. Whether in design, cooking, flower arrangement, chess... all of them!
Sariel: They can no longer taste it. Whether they could taste it or not is unimportant to begin with.
They can't taste it. Was it a single encounter, or did they lose contact, or, are they no longer living? After giving it a thought, I can't manage to ask it.
You: Anyway, now that I've ate this, I am giving the great chef Sariel my full acknowledgment. Don't look at me being like this, I still have quite the requirements towards food.
Sariel: Understood, great food connoisseur.
There's still one last type of dessert, it's a plain-looking white sugar glutinous rice cake. It was sold everywhere during my childhood, granny knows how to make it too, hence I've always been eating it very often.
You: White sugar cake, so nostalgic...
I took a great bite, but almost right at the moment I began chewing, a familiar feeling stunned me.
The environment, sounds, and miscellaneous scents around me all disappeared, my mind is in a complete blank, leaving myself with only that taste.
Needless to say that it's sweet, but there's something else mixed within.
It's a little sour, what sour was it again? Oh right, it's from plums.
There's a little bitterness, what kind of bitterness was it? Oh right, it should be sowthistle*.
Sowthistle? But what is sowthistle?
*T/N: Sonchus oleraceus is a species of flowering plant in the dandelion tribe Cichorieae of the daisy family Asteraceae, native to Europe and Western Asia.
The tastes of the earlier pastries are all new, I knew I never ate them before. This piece should also be the same. But--
I definitely have eaten it before...
??: ... You're going to spoil your teeth if you eat too much.
Someone took a small bite to try the white sugar cake I handed out, and spoke in much disdain.
??: I'll give you a new one, good enough?
And someone gave me a brand new piece, as he leaned against the wall and watched me finished eating it.
??: You know how to make others too? But I'm a little full now... Next time.
Whose words was I uttering? Next time? When is the next time?
I felt joy, as if I have finally found this taste.
... I can't recall it no matter how hard I tried, why am I looking for it?
My heads hurts from thinking about it, but there are only fragments of blankness. It's now a reunion feast that I requested, I should stop thinking.
But there's an instinct feeling that called me to speak, making me to call out for that name, as if to seek refuge.
You: Sariel, my... head hurts.
The response came very quickly. He gently massaged my temples, even my fringe is parted sideways. The slightly calloused palm wiped off the sweat on it.
The warm fingertips gently brushed over the corners of my eyes. Only then I realized that there's a thin trace of tears left there.
Opening my eyes, Sariel's pupils are like the bit of bright gold in my blurry vision, as if there are helpless waves flowing past.
You: I'm sorry.
Sariel: Why are you apologizing?
You: I... Did I ruin the atmosphere?
Sariel: You are sitting here to dine properly, didn't see how you have ruined the atmosphere. What's there to apologize about? You're even weeping.
The curled fingers hesitated for a moment, then stuck on my face.
What's there to apologize about? I stared at him in blankness, even his touch couldn't calm me down. My heart felt nervous, and it felt so unsettling.
Why did I apologize? Because of the headache? Because of the atmosphere? Because I've called Sariel out of panic?
There's still bits of bitterness lingering around the tip of my tongue. No, that's not it, what I wanted to apologize for was--
You: I'm sorry. I definitely have tasted this before, but I don't know where it's from. I really have tasted this before, I just couldn't recall it...
My voice gradually became tinier as I spoke. But, why am I apologizing to Sariel because of this? Even I found it too odd.
Sariel did not ask a thing, only softly answering me.
Sariel: Right here, right now.
You: What?
Sariel (smiling): You, right now, ate this piece of white sugar cake over here. Isn't that obvious? There's even lesser the need for you to apologize.
You: But...
Sariel: It's enough to remember that you are eating it now.
He sighed, then wiped off my drenched cheeks.
Sariel (smiling): If you cry again, there won't be a next time for you to eat it anymore.
You: ... Are you trying to scare kids?
Sariel (smiling): I do things as I say.
Though putting it that way, but there's not a single bit of fierceness paired with those words found on his face.
Watching his expressions, I can't help but to smile from crying. When my eyes squinted, I accidentally squeezed out another trail of tears.
You: Perhaps I've really remembered it wrongly. Then-- Today, right here. Sariel made many pastries that have lost in time. Each and every one of them had a wonderful taste. I will definitely remember them.
With my brain, with my heart, with the taste buds of my tongue, and with each and every inch of the cells in my body, I'll remember them.
With this, even if the memories no longer exist someday, there would still be somewhere for these past happenings to be connected to.
I let out a breath, rubbed my face with all my might, and felt a sense of emptiness.
You: But... the feeling of unable to recall anything is really uncomfortable. Sariel, it really feels uncomfortable...
The pair of eyes gazed deeply at me. He has always been looking at me. Then, the silvery white eyelashes slowly closed shut, covering an emotion that is almost close to compassion.
Sariel: I know.
After eating enough, the girl's dining speed slowed down, but she still can't bear herself to stop. She held the pastries and tasted them bit by bit with plain tea.
Sariel watches her, unable to part his gaze.
Throughout eons of time, only food that were quite ingenious would fancy his eyes. He's good with eating, he would be picky, but he didn't love nor he knew how to cook.
His old friends ridiculed him because of this. He purposely twisted words of human to refute them, saying that gentlemen are always far from the kitchen. He made others laughed at him, saying that he's just an old fox, and has nothing to do with being a gentleman.
As time passes, the seal loosened. The blank memories became a vast redness of smokes that lasted eternally, with a blurry phantom standing by the waters in an unreachable distant.
There will be a day where he will meet this phantom again. Who is it? Where will it be? Why is it? He does not know a thing.
This is the only thing he is certain of. And until that moment, he has to share everything he has seen, hear, and tasted to her.
He started to learn cooking. There are too many matters lost throughout time. Besides himself, there is nobody that he can leave the things he wished to keep with.
"I'm really blessed and happy, to be able to eat desserts that are lost in time."
The words still echoed in his ears.
He still couldn't stop the girl from tasting his pain. Yet he too, at the certain instant, unavoidably have felt the same... happiness.
[Heartthrob 2: Visit temple festival together]
You: There's a temple festival that is close from here, and it's the first day of festival today. We haven't been to a new year temple festival, so how about we take this opportunity to go there together?
Sariel: Why haven't I heard that it's close by?
You: You never paid attention to festival information anyway.
Since Sariel has never even heard of the venue, he probably wouldn't even know that there is a very effective wishing spot-- an ancient temple.
It's said that the village at the mountain foot was once troubled by disasters. The people hung red silks with names written on them onto the tree in the temple to pray for the god's blessings. The gods were touched by their hard work and kindness, and actually granted their wish.
This tree was the abode of the gods back then, and as long as the people of the future generations hang their safety talismans onto the tree, they will be blessed with protection.
The festival is organized with the first intentions to welcome the day of the descendance of the gods.
The reason why I made this suggestion, besides to have fun, it is also an important aim for me to secretly sneak out to receive a safety talisman for Sariel throughout the festival.
As for why I had to do it secretly--
You: Since Sariel doesn't believe in gods after all...
In Kyoto*, Sariel said he would never hang ema ever again, and the more deadly thing was, I even boldly said that I don't believe in these too. If I were to tell a similar request, I'd be mocked by Sariel for going back on my words.
*T/N: Reference to this battle pass date.
Sariel: What are you muttering about?
You: Sariel, do you believe in the gods?
Sariel: ... No.
See? As expected.
The words I said back then were indeed sincere. Rather than believing in the gods, I trust my efforts better. But the longer I am with Sariel, the more willing I am to anticipate for the existence of the gods.
Even if the changes are extremely tiny, I hope for the Gods to protect him, and protect our safety.
The skies turned dark very early during winters. Sariel and I arrived the temple festival venue, and what welcomes us is a great patch of warm lights, followed by the bustling noises.
Stalls, colorful lanterns filled our eyes in the bustling crowd. I am curious at everything, and I wanted to have a look at everything.
You: Sariel, look at this paper windmill, it can spin so fast even though it isn't windy now.
Sariel: There's a small electric fan on the table at the back.
You: Sariel, look at that opera mask*, it has an angry look, doesn't it look like someone who's looking at my design drafts--
*T/N: Specifically, it's Chinese opera make up, it's called 脸谱. Different colors and expressions have different meanings, but it's typical to see these made into merchandises like masks, or dough figures. Please take a look at the patterns here!
Sariel: No.
You: Sariel, do you want to eat winter dates? Are they dates made in winter?
Sariel: It's a pastry made of glutinous rice, it has nothing to do with snow and dates.
You: Oh...
Though crowded, the two of us weren't separated. This is all thanks to the powerful palm that has been holding onto a piece of my clothing. I would feel very safe no matter where I go.
Suddenly, a colorful signboard attracted my attention. The words "People's Handicraft Society" are written on it.
There are a few dough dolls placed on the table by its side, there are the people from the four classic Chinese novels*, and there are also portraits of people I can't recognize, but they all look lively. I approached to observe them closely.
*T/N: The four are: Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Journey to the West, Water Margin, and Dream of the Red Chamber.
Owner: Young lady, come and have a look. This art is passed down for three generations in my family, if I were to say that my crafts are on the second place, nobody dares to claim the first spot. As long as you're sitting here for 10 minutes, I will be able to pinch your appearance just like the original. If it's nowhere alike, it will be free of charge.
You: Really?
I lifted my head up and looked towards Sariel.
Sariel: What are you looking at me for?
You: Well I was worried that you wouldn't want to wait.
Sariel: It's just 10 minutes.
You: Okay! Then boss, try making one for me.
Owner: Alrighty!
Shortly after, the dough doll is done. The owner didn't lie, it really looks very much like me.
You: I think it looks cuter than I do. Sariel, what do you think?
Sariel glanced at it, taking the doll, with an almost unnoticeable curve appearing from his eyes.
Sariel: It's a little similar. Not as silly as the original.
Though saying so, he held the doll in his hand and kept looking at it without returning it to me.
You: Do you like it? I'll gift it back to you then.
Sariel: I didn't say I like it, don't simply make guesses.
Sariel's arms drooped. The dough doll is stuck by his trousers, hidden in the shadows. I opened my palm towards him.
You: Alright, then it's better to give it back to me then. So the doll will not be sad to follow someone who doesn't like it.
Sariel pursed his thin lips, looking as if he wanted to say something, but swallowed his words back. He placed the dough doll back to my palm, and turned around to look at the fireworks on the streets.
I smiled in secret, then placed the doll properly into my bag. It's obvious that he likes it, I'll look for some free time to put it on the flower rack of his greenhouse.
There's a cotton candy stall a little further in front of us. The displayed cotton candies are in various shapes with dreamy colors, hence it is very popular that its queue seems endless.
I tried to stand at the end of the queue, and suddenly feel like my presence is insignificant.
Sariel: Queue if you want to eat.
You: But it's too long, how about taking a look of the stalls ahead?
Sariel: Whichever queue ahead won't be any shorter than this.
I looked towards the center of the temple festival, that's the most crowded place, and each stall are indeed jampacked, that there's no way to tell which queue they are for.
You: That's true too...
Sariel scoffed softly, walked straight to the end of the queue and stood there. Him standing there has not made him look any insignificant, but have instead looked particularly eye-catching because of his tall and slender figure.
Looking at him, an idea suddenly surfaced from my mind. Isn't now the best time to request and hang safety amulets?
It's too interesting to browse everywhere with Sariel, that I almost threw this "big issue" way behind my mind.
There's almost no way for me to justify myself to separate from Sariel, or should I say, I don't want to separate from him too...
Sariel: Swaying here and there, are you a roly-poly?
You: Was I swaying?
Sariel: Then was I the one swaying?
I let out a couple of dry laughs, clenched my fist, and made up my mind.
You: Uh, there's something I wanted to eat that I forgot to buy just now...
Sariel: Winter dates?
You: Snow... Ah yeah, it's snow dates. I wanted to go and buy them, I'll be back soon!
The expression of "I knew it" is written all over Sariel's face. He waved, probably signaling me to just go. Just when I turned around, he called out to me agian.
You: W- what's wrong?
Sariel: What color of cotton candy do you want?
So he's asking about this, thank goodness, thank goodness.
You: Red! It's the color of the day.
Sariel: Understood.
You: I'm here...
Arms supporting my knees, it took me quite the effort to finally be able to breathe normally from panting. The temple is at the end of the festival venue, it's a completely different direction from the snow dates. In order to not look suspicious, I purposely made a huge detour.
It's the busiest time for the temple festival now, so there are instead not many people that are praying here. A few lanterns are hanging on the eaves of the porch, exuding a faint, quiet light.
There is a tall tree standing beside the incense burner on the empty plot. There are already amulet plates and red ropes the table under the tree for everyone's usage.
You: Scholarly success, Raking prosperity, year-round peace... there it is!
I held the safety amulet I chose in my hand, but I noticed another plate is still quietly laying by the side.
You: Conjugal bliss*...
*T/N: 琴瑟和鸣 literally means "the lute and psaltery are in harmony" but it's also a wish for felicity of husband and wife.
My fingertips subconsciously touched the dents of the words. It's such a rare chance, I suppose hanging another one isn't considered greedy...
Just when I was hesitating, dizziness suddenly struck me from behind. Before I could respond to it, everything went pitch black before my eyes.
--
... My body feels very stiff. It feels like there's something pressing onto my chest and limbs, making me immobile.
My mind is still in a blur, but thankfully my consciousness has returned, and I can hear the bustling noises. Right, I should be in the temple festival.
You: What happened to me earlier...
??: Where is she?
Someone is talking, the voice is very familiar, but it has an unfamiliar irritancy and panic.
You: Sariel?
I tried my best to open my eyes, but noticed they are open, it's just that the surroundings are very dark, I can't see a thing.
I suddenly panicked, and Sariel's response did not come either. Another voice sounded, but that voice sounded familiar.
??: I- I don't know too... Oh right! She should be here!
Whatever before me has finally brightened up. I am now facing directly towards a slightly warm breath.
The silvery white lashes is drooping, and when it blinks, the top and bottom connects into a single line. The shadows his fringe projects almost fell on my face.
The nose bridge and cheeks I'm so used to looking now glows in a lustrous sheen under the warm light. His lips are tightly pursed, and it's pursed into an extremely thin line.
By the time I came back to my senses, my entire body felt like it's burning.
You: This is way too close... Sariel...
I mustered my courage to look towards the pair of golden eyes. There's a deep line in the center, just like a beast. I can rarely see it this clearly, where both crystal clear eyes are reflecting how I look.
Wait, my... look?
Tiny hand, tiny leg, round eyes, with hair that is stuck onto my head strand by strand, with a slender hand holding my waist.
What Sariel is looking is the little doll that we got from the dough doll master!
You: Unless I became a dough doll!
The bright lanterns are behind Sariel, and I am no longer under the tree. Before I can think about this clearly, I only saw him reaching a hand over.
My waist feels a little ticklish as the lightly calloused fingertip caresses over. Sariel's movements are very gentle, and I'm placed flat on that warm palm.
There was an instant where I saw the person opposite of him. That's me, a "me" that is fully panicked and moving around in anxiousness.
"You": I saw something missing in her soul, and I was worried that something would happen to her, so I followed her. I didn't thought it'd turn out this way--
Sariel: Why did you say that she's here?
"You": Her original soul will choose a similar medium in order to search for a place of belonging.
I was made to stand up, turned a direction, and forced to look at my own face, face-to-face.
"You": Don't panic, I know a way. It's the Ghost Festival* today, there will be lanterns that will send me back on the river, when I manage to leave, she will naturally return.
Sariel did not speak. A sense of suppression as if there's an incoming mountain rains could be felt. I clearly couldn't see it, but I could feel that I am shrouded by that strong feeling.
His voice is very deep, that it could make my veins freeze.
Sariel: It's the first lunar month*.
*T/N: Ghost festival is... on the 7th lunar month...
The person on the opposite stunned, and her brows slowly turned into a deep frown.
"You": Could I have mistaken it... No wonder I didn't manage to bump into anyone tonight...
"I" looked at Sariel, gaze wandering, as if she's about to cry from fear.
"You": T- There's still another way. It's just... extremely difficult.
Sariel: Say it.
"You": It's the first lunar month to day. Lantern festival... it's the sky lanterns! It's still close to the Lantern Festival, so it will work. Just write our lunar date and hour of birth, disasters encountered throughout our lives in full detail onto the lantern. Then burn it in the place I met her, it can also help me to leave.
As the conversation have reached this point, I have finally understood what happened. It seems like there's a naughty soul that have mistook the date entered my body, and squeezed my soul out into this dough doll.
I can see and hear, but I can't make a sound, nor I can move.
This is too bizarre, but it is the current situation, so I had no choice but to believe it. Thankfully, unsure of the reason, Sariel and "I" met here.
Just thinking of this, as if there's tacit, the finger placed over my shoulder that supported me to stand up has tightened, as if its owner is also feeling afraid.
Sariel: Understood. Where did she meet you?
"You": Just right at the end of this road, under the giant tree of the temple.
I helplessly watched a bright red safety amulet taken out from my bag, then another that writes "Conjugal bliss".
Sariel took them, and stared at them for a while.
You: Oh no...
Sariel looked expressionless, but from the corner of his eyes, a line of gaze fell on me, this very doll that has no power to retaliate.
I have no way to refute, nor I could snatch the amulets, not even capable of raising my arms to cover my face. It's considered that I have finally tasted the medicine of suffering in "silence".
A while later, Sariel kept them, looked at me, raising a hand, and removed a black cotton thread that was stuck on my face with the edge of his palm.
My body felt light, and I'm now placed in the pocket in front of his chest, sinking in the soft fabric, and my head is popping out just nicely that I can see the sceneries of the street.
I seemed to have heard a sigh, and Sariel turned around.
Sariel: What's your name?
"You": Me?
Sariel: Correct.
"You": My name is Nian Qiao, I'm eleven years old. Aren't you angry anymore? Your gaze earlier looked like you are going to make my soul disperse.
Sariel: She will ask for this name by the time she's back. If I can't say it, she will definitely be chirpy and pestering me so much that I won't have peace.
You: I won't be chirpy and pestering...
What I am leaning against is a firm chest, that I could feel his incomparably heavy heartbeats. Sariel seemed like he's talking to himself, voice sounding soft and affirmative, but his voice feels like it disperses easily.
He paused. Is he waiting for something? But I have no way to convey my complaints.
Sariel: Let's go*.
*T/N: Here, in this part, the way this line is voiced is as if Sariel is talking to you.
Tourist: Hey, look at that.
You: ......
Tourist: He looks kinda good... No, a little weird.
MC: Uhm...
Tourist: Are they publicly displaying their affection? There's no need to go this far.
You: This is too...
Sariel is already having a tall figure with an outstanding appearance. Now that he is having a colorful dough doll in his chest, it is even more eye-catching when he's walking on the road.
I have never received so much perplexed or surprised gaze in my life, and from this angle, I can only barely see Sariel's jawline, he seemed oblivious and unfazed.
Nian Qiao looked at him, then looked at her surroundings, and made a suggestion timidly.
Nian Qiao: How about I hold it for you? Then there wouldn't me that many people looking at you.
Sariel: No need. She can see the outside, right?
Nian Qiao: I can't tell either. Perhaps she can hear and see, or perhaps all of her senses are there. Or perhaps, she wouldn't know a thing.
Sariel: Mm.
As soon as her voice dies off, I saw my own face looking like a helpless child.
Nian Qiao: God, if my method doesn't work--
Sariel: There will be other methods that will work. I will look for them.
Nian Qiao: What if it takes a very long time to find it?
Sariel: Then I'll wait. She likes to enjoy looking at flowers in the courtyard, so she'll be enjoying herself by looking at flowers in the courtyard; She likes to wander around to look around the world, so she will still wander and look around; She likes design, so it's not impossible for me to change seasonal clothes for her on a daily basis. There won't be any difference.
Nian Qiao: The very long might be a hundred years, or even a thousand years...
My heart trembled. All of my embarrassment, panic and the joy of being treated gently have all disappeared, only coldness seeping through all of my senses.
Sariel remained silent for a while. As his chest heaves just as his breath, the tone of his speech became abnormally sharp.
Sariel: A hundred years, a thousand years, they aren't considered anywhere long.
Bang-- The vintage popcorn machine* at the stall spreads its scent of sweetness.
*T/N: I felt like the younger generations wouldn't know this, but in old times, the vintage popcorn machines in China are made of metal, and when the popcorn is cooked, it makes a loud explosive sound. There's a video recording on YouTube here if you're interested.
But I didn't hear this loud bang. Unsure how he did it, Sariel have expected it. At that instant, he curled his palms and covered my ears.
The children's cheers, the pouring sounds of popcorns, sounds of the breezes, they are all gone.
What I could hear is the dry palm seeping tiny beads of sweat, just like tears that are so fine that they are almost invisible. Would eyes that are made of dough feel soreness too?
There are very little places that sells sky lanterns throughout the recent years. Even if there are any, it's only the shape that are made, and they can't set flight. Thank goodness we only needed to burn it.
After circling the entire temple festival, we finally managed to buy one in a secluded corner.
Nian Qiao is still a child after all. She was scared by Sariel, but probably because she saw him actually being capable of speaking properly, she showed some liveliness again.
Nian Qiao: So fragrant. I have not been able to smell so many scents for a long time. Can I try these food before I leave?
Sariel: No.
Nian Qiao: Why is that?
Sariel: No why.
Nian Qiao pouted and frowned, looking like she's about to cry.
Sariel: What now?
Nian Qiao: I don't know, hearing you saying that, it had responded. The original owner must've been feeling sad.
You: How could it be? It's just that one phrase and my body reacted in reflex?! Also I won't cry in such an ugly manner... I think.
No matter how I think, I only think that it's this naughty "ghost" telling lies, but Sariel glanced at her, and actually walked straight towards a stall by the side.
You: Ah, it's the winter dates...
Sariel bought a box of winter dates, and took one out to place it on Nian Qiao's hand.
Nian Qiao: Can I only eat one?
Sariel: You can only eat one. She has eaten a lot other things, she'll be bloated.
Nian Qiao: Thank you then!
Watching Nian Qiao putting the little dessert into her mouth, Sariel sealed the box again. And as if it's just like what Nian Qiao said, I still retained resonance with my body, and tasted the sweetness.
You: You kept calling me a dummy, but you're clearly also a dummy fox.
Under the tree, Sariel borrowed brush and ink from the temple, and spreads the sky lantern open on the incense table.
Sariel: Do you want me to write it or do you want to write it yourself?
Nian Qiao: I... am not very good in writing*.
*T/N: With this I am very sure Nian Qiao is a soul that has been wandering around for many, many years.
Sariel nodded, then leaned down.
He then suddenly seemed to have recalled something, he took me out from his chest pocket, took off his scarf and made a cushion that blocks off wind from all directions, allowing me to stay there.
Because of the angle of vision, I can't see what Sariel wrote on the paper clearly, only hearing Nian Qiao speaking slowly, first her birthday, then her year of death.
Nian Qiao: When I was eleven, my parents wanted to marry me off, but that person isn't someone I love. There was a certain someone, he told me, that besides me, he won't marry anyone else. And besides him, I will not marry anyone else. I ran out secretly, and Master Jingxu of this temple allowed me to take refuge here. Not long after, a disaster struck. Many people were sent to this temple, including him. But after a night, he no longer continued breathing. I hugged him and cried for a long time, hence I fell ill too.
Is this the disaster that was chased off by the gods in the legends? Perhaps death is too far away from her, that Nian Qiao spoke in a very calm manner.
Sariel recorded them all, and finished his last stroke. His hands are stable, but his gaze isn't completely cold, but he also doesn't look overly compassionate.
Nian Qiao carefully read those content.
Nian Qiao: Turns out my life story looks like this when it's written out. I finally knew it now.
Sariel turned the sky lantern to the other side and continued writing. Nian Qiao looked a little surprised.
Nian Qiao: Her destiny looks a little similar to mine, no wonder--
Her words were only halfway spoken, because Sariel's hand paused.
Nian Qiao: I- I was wrong, she is definitely going to...
Sariel: No matter what her destiny is, she will be joyfully living safe and sound.
Nian Qiao: Yes, with a lover like you, she will definitely not be like me.
Sariel (flustering): ... Ahem.
You (flustering): ... Ahem.
This phrase isn't too common. With one silent and the other moving, Sariel and I coughed together at the same time.
It's then another series of rustling sounds, looks like it's the turn for him to write my life disasters.
I remembered Nian Qiao saying that all details have to be written. I can't say a single word right now, I don't know if it'd work out either.
To my surprise, Sariel is writing very quickly, with not even a sliver of hesitance, that the bright candles portrays the ever-moving brush shadow.
Nian Qiao: To be able to write so much, you really do remember things about her so well.
You: ... Do I have a lot of life disaster?
After thinking repetitively, I don't suppose that's the case. Perhaps Sariel wrote even the most trivial matters to seek assurance.
You: He can't possibly actually write the number of times my draft submissions have failed, right...?
Just when I find it a little embarrassing, a flame has already lit up before me. The thin paper of the sky lantern melted in the flames, that I missed the opportunity to read the contents on it.
The steaming heat made everything around it to look twisted. After a while, I noticed that it isn't because of the heat, it's the world around me that looks twisted.
The familiar dizziness is here, I suppose I'll black out later.
In my blurry gaze, Nian Qiao tiptoed as she wobbled, and told Sariel something.
You: Goodbye, Nian Qiao.
--
Moving my fingers, I felt the touch of fabric. Moving my toes, it was blocked by the hard shoe head.
Opening my eyes, I can really open it for now. What lies in my line of vision is a giant tree. I'm sitting on a bench, pillowing on a comfortable shoulder. Turning my line of gaze, and I saw the side profile that is in my expectations.
Sariel that has always been sitting upright is now slightly hunching, so I can lean on his shoulder comfortably. He is still holding the dough doll in his hand, looking at it with full of focus, that he wasn't able to notice my wake.
My neck moved carelessly. Sariel startled, then turned around. At the instant his gaze met mine, it's clearly seen that he has relaxed.
Sariel: Came back to life*?
*T/N: 回魂 Is also a saying for the time when a deceased soul returns to their home for a visit before they are sent to hell.
You: I really came back to life... How did you know it's me? What if it's Nian Qiao that hasn't left?
Sariel: I'll know as soon as I look at your eyes.
The moon has rose high. It has probably been a long time since my soul left my body.
Sariel's voice sounded a little tired, so I tugged his sleeve.
You: I'm back, don't worry anymore alright?
There are no disses of "don't think nonsense", nor there were disses of "self-indulgent". Sariel only nodded.
A bright red amulet is placed in my hand. I lowered my hand to have a look, it's that piece of amulet that says "safety year after year".
Sariel: Why don't you call me to come together?
This question came earlier than I thought, that I stuttered a little.
Sariel isn't looking at me, only staring at the old tree filled with red ropes. His side profile is shrouded by the silvery white moonlight.
A lot of nonsense stopped by my lips. I suppressed my complicated emotions.
You: Because you don't believe in the gods... but...
But-- the one in a million change of protection, the unfulfilled promise, and the long times that we've spent together. I spilled all of my thoughts out at a go.
You: So, I don't want to go back on my words in front of you.
Sariel remained silent. The candlelight around us are all reflected in his eyes, that the emotions lie within flickered and became blurry.
Sariel: Do you think that these matters are very important?
You: Of course they are very important.
Whether it's our matching perspectives, or the old traces of life that has led to how we relate now, I don't want to overturn these matters.
Sariel: You're really hopelessly dumb. Who you wanted to pray to, what you wanted to hang, there's no need for you to mind them to begin with.
You: Of course they don't matter, it's you who mind--
Sariel: I went back at my words.
I was interrupted, and received a blow, that I can only finally speak again after some time.
You: Are you saying you'll hang them together with me?
Sariel: I will. "It's you who mind them", you are actually not wrong with that.
I widened my eyes at him. Sariel's voice is very soft, eyelids drooping.
Plop-- The breeze brushes past, and the dough doll that was placed between us rolled to my hand.
Our hands both reached out to it together, and held on an arm each.
This doll that have been through spiritual phenomena throughout the entire night that was once rejected by Sariel, is now in a state of being "snatched".
You: Sariel, then is there something more that you can go back at your words too?
Sariel: What is it?
I let go of my hand, and looked towards his eyes.
You: This doll, it will be very happy to follow you home.
Sariel: ......
Seeing the doll leaning towards Sariel, then finally falling into that coat's side pocket, I can't help but to let out a smile.
You: Speaking of it, what did Nian Qiao told you when she left?
Hearing so, Sariel moved his gaze away.
Sariel: The last step of soul return is to kiss the forehead of this body.
You: She said that?! This body? This body of mine? Did you kiss it?
I kept receiving emotional impacts wave after wave, I can't believe my ears at all.
Sariel: How would that be possible, it is obviously a prank.
How could it be impossible? You were fooled when she made you to let her eat the winter date.
I complained internally. Although this answer sounded reassuring, but there are also some little disappointment that surfaces from the depths of my heart.
Since, perhaps Nian Qiao has already left a second later, and that time--
As my mind reaches this point, my words subconsciously came out from my lips.
You: I'm still a little dizzy now... who knows it might be true?
Until I saw Sariel looking surprised, only then I realized what I just said.
Whoosh-- I quickly stood up to cover the heat of my face with the warm flower lantern's candlelight hanging high above me.
You: I'll hang the safety amulet!
Coming to the tree without looking back, I dare not to look at Sariel's changes in expression. I chanted "sincere wishes will come true" as I suppressed the messy emotions within.
Standing here this time, everything have became different.
Sariel is right behind me, watching me searching for a suitable branch.
I understand, that even if the gods really live here, they are definitely fair to people. Until disasters have caused pain, that they would descend and chase them off.
But I still can't help but to pray to them--
Please take a look at Sariel, even if he doesn't believe in you, even if he has no wills to be saved, even if this is merely my selfish thought. But if you are sparing a gaze on earth, please grace a glance upon him, and you will realize that among the vast lives, he is that person that is worthy of your blessings.
The red rope is tied to the branch, and the knot is slowly tightened.
There are so much more that I wanted to tell the gods. His sufferings, his tenderness, and his cold yet absolute expressions when he talked about a hundred, a thousand, and a lifetime, but I couldn't make it in time.
A pair of hands held my waist. My body stumbled in reflex, and my shoulders bumped into a soft chest.
I tried to turn around, but the back of my head rubbed against a fluffy scarf, and a coat that carries the night coldness.
You: Sa...
The name is stuck in my lips. Sariel droops his slender neck, lips onto my forehead.
Does he really believe that my soul has yet to return? My limbs stiffened for a second out of shock, then became extremely soft from the overflowing joy.
Mustering enough of courage, I looked up. The long shadows coming from his fringe are almost connecting to my hair.
Golden eyes closed, only the silvery white lashes left, and only with its slight trembles, that blossoms of duckweed bloomed one after another in my heart.
Just like the moment I returned to becoming a doll, I can't speak, but laid in his palms and enjoy all of his tenderness.
But I never knew there would be such a light kiss in this world, even his breath is weak. Sariel only stuck his lips over there, very faintly.
His lips are very cold, and slight shivers can be felt from the body encircling mine.
Suddenly, the tone of speech that sounded with full of resolute, his calm expressions, the usual conversations as soon as I woke up, all of these illusions seemed like they have been unveiled.
Sariel, you've worked hard just now? Sariel, are you very tired today? Sariel, are you worrying about me? Sariel...
You: Are you afraid...?
The arms encircling me tightened. The joy of the initial intimacy has faded, and turned into delicate feelings of pain.
I tiptoed, allowing me to be closer to him, allowing my burning skin to warm his lips.
From my forehead, cheeks, ears, if it's possible, I wanted to use every part of my body that has warmth to tell him, that I am right here.
Sariel stunned for an instant, then lowered his head even further, very solemnly.
After a long time, the cuddling bodies finally had a bit of space between them. The palm that finally gained some warmth climbed onto the back of my hand, slender fingers holding another piece of amulet.
You: I thought you threw it away.
Sariel: I told you I'll hang it with you.
This isn't even considered a response, and I wasn't intending to listen to it anyway.
The interlocked hands are what filled my mind and eyes. Sariel led me as we awkwardly tied a knot.
With a pull and a twist, and accidentally, the rope encircled our fingers into it. Our pinkes are tied in a short yet twisted red thread*.
*T/N: This feels like a thread of fate TT
After we are done hanging, the red circles felt like they are still there, drooping to the side, with both ends connected.
I stared at them for a long time.
You: Sariel, you said so many times that you'll do this and that with me. But I think I have never told you properly, that I will also always be here to be of your company.
Just like how you'll do for me--
No other things needed, even if the garden is barren, even if the sceneries are gone, even if people, things, and skies have changed, as long as I can sit face to face with you, I would still feel happy.
You: So, no matter what I will turn into, I will definitely hear your voice. You... will never have to feel afraid forever.
I wanted to turn around, but the body behind me is unwilling to give in. I suddenly realized that since earlier, it has been a long time since I last saw Sariel's expression.
But this is no longer important. The slightly warm breath sinks all the way down, the soft cheeks stuck by my neck, stubbornly nuzzling softly.
No sharp fangs, no sharp claws, only endless softness, I can feel a young beast's nuzzling.
In the breeze, the two amulets swayed casually, bumping into each other lightly, letting out a sound.
Conjugal bliss, year-round peace.
The temple festival is about to end. The stall owner looked at the red cotton candy, looking troubled. That very tall young man that said "I'll leave it here for a while" has yet to bring it away after a long time.
Back then, he tugged a young girl, but was swung away in panic. In a trance, the expressions on the handsome face looked scary upon sight.
He wondered what happens to the two afterwards.
It's already late night. Those who came for prayers have left, the candlelight are also extinguished, only the young monks and nuns cleaning the ashes in the courtyard.
The fallen leaves fell into the duster, covering a piece of sky lantern paper that is burnt on the edge, and also covered the three blurred inked writing.
Qi Si Li.
[Common Ending]
By the time the moon is high up, it feels like all activities and liveliness should stop, to create an opportunity to gaze at the moon like this.
Sariel and I leaned before the window. There are yet any scents of flowers or birdsongs, nor there are any insect cries. The world is quiet.
I raised my head as I looked towards Sariel, only to coincidentally find him speaking unexpectedly.
Sariel: According to your saying, the celebration for new year is considered over after the first month.
You: Not just me, everyone says the same too. Is this your first time hearing this saying?
Sariel: No. But it is indeed my first time celebrating new year like this.
He turned his head around and looked indoors, so I followed his line of gaze too.
The entire house is filled with red lanterns and flower lanterns that I have installed. The blanket on the sofa is now messy from my touch, the food on the table is still not kept, with fruits and vegetables scattering on the cooking table, and the TV is replaying colorful videos.
How does this even look like Sariel's home anymore, it's simply looking just like... our home.
My heart feels sore and soft, so I spoke.
You: Was the celebration happy for you then?
Sariel: Are you coming here to make me happy?
This question is a little weird. I looked up to meet a solemn glow from his eyes.
After giving it a serious thought, I shook my head.
Due to separation with family members, and my anticipation for a new year with someone in my company that I have not experienced for many years, I have made so much arrangements in excitement, and I have been making endless requests.
You: That's not it. I'm here for myself. For the various things we've done, they were merely because I wanted to enjoy reunions with you. To do these things during new year always feels like there's a special meaning behind them.
Sariel: Mm.
I took a deep breath, not moving my gaze away.
You: Am I sounding a little soliloquizing?
The Chinese New Year celebration is over, and Chinese Lantern Festival* is also over. The after the liveliness reaches its climax, the quietness will naturally descend. Perhaps I was just afraid of that moment, so I wanted to make this new year last longer, and even longer.
*T/N: Chinese Lantern Festival is YuanXiao, the 15th day of Chinese New Year.
Sariel: No... It's fine just like this.
You: Then how about you? Why did you agree to these things?
To accommodate so easily to me, to wish me happy new year, putting on the gold necklace I gifted, are they all done to make me happy?
I can't manage to ask him this question. Because, it's clear that Sariel shouldn't be this kind of person.
Sariel paused, as if he recalled a certain something, and an extremely faint smile surfaced over his face.
Sariel: I probably also wanted to... enjoy reunions*.
*T/N: Sariel lost the person fought alongside him on mid-autumn festival, the day of reunion.
Sariel, who has always been able to speak in witty repartees, is now only repeating my words right at this moment.
The word "reunion" is spoke in an awkward tone, it's just as if he has never spoke them clearly throughout his long life.
Moonlight shines brightly onto Sariel's hair and side profile, flowing like silvery white waterfalls, fluttering like an ethereal god.
But Sariel is no god, he's just a person. Someone who feels happiness, anger, anticipation, and sadness.
As long as I think of this, the fear and doubts I feel have ceased their existence, and a lot of courage came to me out of nowhere.
You: Sariel, I used to be so afraid that you'd be gone if I became inattentive.
Sariel: Where would I go?
You: I don't know too, the Heavenly Palace? The Dragon King's Palace*?
*T/N: Fictional places in Chinese folktales.
Sariel: No way.
His tone of speech sounded with some disdain, so I burst out in laughter.
You: Who knows?
Staring at the moon outside the window, it's just a plain, barren space over there.
You: Regardless what it is, I can finally tell you about this right now. I can finally say, "don't go, just stay in this mortal world with me forever and ever".
Grabbing onto Sariel's slightly cooling sleeve soaking in the colors of the night, he held my hand back, passing his warmth over.
Sariel: Silly.
I knew that he must've agreed to it.
After a while more, the first lunar month will be over. After the first lunar month, the new year will come to an end.
Being with Sariel, we exchanged blessings, made red lanterns and flower lanterns, pasted paper-cut arts, decorated bonsais, enjoyed sceneries, exchanged red packets, and guessed lantern riddles.
No matter how much I've tried to extend it, a new year like this is about to end soon.
But the crescent moon will be full again as the cycle repeats.
There will definitely be more good days to come for Sariel and I.
Until next update! :)