Main Story Chapter 13-19: Witness of the Past (过去的证人） | Light and Night 光与夜之恋
Before reading this chapter, please consider reading Chapter 13-17 here!
TRIGGER WARNING!!! PROCEED WITH CAUTION!!!
Mentions of killing others, car accident, abandonment
After returning home, my mind is oddly in a mess.
When I'm leaning against the balcony and watching the bright moon, everything that I could think of are all related to Osborn.
I knew what happened to him now.
I knew he became someone like who he is because how he was beaten and crushed by unimaginable difficulties.
There's no reason for me to request him to tell me everything. Even if the wounds have recovered, scars still remain on the flesh and skin.
But I really wanted to walk into his past. I don't want to be someone who's only being protected by him.
The night winds suddenly howled. I looked at the heavy, dark clouds by the edge of the skies, and I can't help but to feel a little worried.
Where could Osborn be right now? Is he still speeding and venting? It would probably be very dangerous when it rains later.
I wanted to send him a message, but thinking that it's going to be even more dangerous to look at the phone while driving, I gave up on the thought.
After keeping my laundry and folding them to put them into the wardrobe, I tried keeping myself busy, but my heart still felt empty.
Walking back to the balcony as I mechanically keep my laundry, I suddenly startled.
Under the orange-yellowish streetlights, I saw a familiar figure.
The moonlight leaves a faint sheen behind him, yet he's not budging at all, only to lift his head up and look towards my direction.
It's Osborn.
We are clearly separated far away, but why can I see the sadness and guilt in his eyes so clearly?
My heart felt sore. When did he come? Why didn't he tell me? Since he has already chased me off his car, why did he look for me?
But I also feel happy. He's fine, he looks safe. With the two different types of feelings intertwined, before I have came to my senses, I've already dashed downstairs.
Looking from afar, he's still standing there. He looks a little sad under the moonlight.
Seeing that I'm approaching him, he approaches me too, hastening, as though he can't wait for it.
Every scene where he walks towards me have all replayed before my eyes.
Suddenly, I stopped my footsteps and avoided his gaze. I don't know why I am doing this, it's just because I'm not done being angry yet. When I look at him right now, the resolute-sounding "get out of the car" still continued echoing by my ear.
However, Osborn has already walked towards my side, holding me right into his embrace, so tightly that I can't breathe.
You: Weren't you going to vent on your own? Why are you looking for me now...
Osborn: I wanted to see you.
Who are you to talk to yourself as you wish? I muttered internally, a little angry, but I'm feeling more sad.
You: Do you think I'm going to show myself just because you wanted to see me? What if I don't want to see you...
Osborn: I've seen you now.
It seems like he can always find a way that I won't be able to win him in arguments. So I can only lean into his chest, and my tears finally shed after being held in for so long.
You: Then why did you have to chase me off? I wanted to watch over you and stay by your side too...
Osborn only allowed me to punch his chest deliberately, remaining silent. Until I'm finally tired, he wrapped my fists with his palm, and gently caressed the back of my hand with his thumb.
Osborn: Does it hurt?
I shook my head, tilting my head up to look at his slightly reddened eyes. Did he happen to cry too?
The feelings of soreness surges up to my chest once again, and I carefully examined the person before my eyes.
You: Were you speeding to vent just now? Are you injured?
He suddenly smiled, only shaking his head, and pulled me into his embrace once again.
Osborn: I'm sorry, I've made you worry. You can make me to apologize in any way you want.
You: Then you're not allowed to chase me away anymore.
Osborn: I promise you, I won't let you leave no matter what happen ever again.
You: Then would you be willing to tell me about your past?
I leaned onto his shoulder and spoke softly. But I've already made up my mind, that I won't force him to do that even if he's unwilling to do so.
Because no matter how important the past were, they are already in the past. The current Osborn is now perfectly by my side, and we're living in the present and the future.
I wanted to understand him, only because I didn't want him to face them all on his own. Or should I say, I wish to bring him out from the past.
Osborn: Okay.
I startled slightly, and let him go in disbelief.
You: Really?
Osborn: Why would I lie to you? I had no plans to hide it from you to begin with. Wait for me a little, I'll buy something.
The night air is very humid, that even a single inhale of the air makes my chest feel cold. I leaned onto the lobby's glass, watching Osborn walking towards me, with two canned drinks in his hand.
You: Milk?
He threw one of the cans to me.
Osborn: To warm your hands.
You: Why is yours beer?
Osborn: Because I like drinking it.
You: I wanted to drink it too.
Osborn raised a brow, pulled the pull-tab and handed it to my mouth. But after I've only taken a tiny sip, he took it back.
Osborn: That's enough.
You: I'm not-...
He acted as though he didn't hear me, tilted his head up and took a few gulps, even making out a relaxed sound.
Osborn: It's too late, I'll treat you to drink all you want.
You: That's what you said.
Osborn: It's a promise. Then where do you want me to begin telling from?
You: Uh... the time we met when we were little. I really wanted to know, how did you end up being locked in the warehouse? Was it because you fought with your classmates?
Osborn: Nah, my classmates can't wait to avoid me. Those who locked me were the punks around there, they always like to block people's paths on their way home to ask for 'toll fares'. They asked me at one point of time, so I beat them up, and threw them into a warehouse. I didn't expect them to assault me on the following day.
Recalling the day far in the distant, I could still remember it clearly.
You: You were so badly injured... your arms were filled with blood.
Osborn: Didn't we have your handkerchief to bandage for me back then? I've gotta thank you for not letting me to die there.
You: Did you look for them after that then?
Osborn looks at me and smiled.
Osborn: You really do understand me well. After I've recovered, I fought with them again. They've probably got subdued, and never appeared again ever since. Hey, what's with this expression of yours? I've told you long ago that I've never been a good student since I was a kid.
You: It's not about being good or bad, I was just a little surprised... Moreover, this can't be completely blamed on you, they were the bullies to begin with.
Osborn: But I ended up getting transferred because of this, and I was almost sent to a welfare home by the bunch of old men from the street office.
You: Welfare home?
Osborn: Mhm, they think Ye Chuan is a disqualified foster father for letting me out to fight.
You: So you were...
Osborn: When I was nine, my mom's gone. My father went missing even earlier. Ye Chuan doesn't care about me that much. So I was free ever since I was nine.
He sounded very relaxed when he mentioned this, and he was also very calm, as though he's telling another person's story. Seeing that I'm stunned, he chuckled instead, and my heart is uncontrollably feeling pained for him.
Osborn: Actually there aren't much to tell either, I can't remember much from my childhood. I can only remember that my mom has always been crying, that I could still recall her crying sounds from time to time. She was very happy on the night she left, she didn't shed a tear. I saw her finally stopped crying, so I was also very happy. Perhaps it's because she has finally made up her mind.
He pinches the pull-tab from time to time that the can lets out a puffy sound, as though it's a heart that is trying its best to breathe.
Osborn: Oh, I also remembered her telling me that she would come back on my next birthday when she left. Only children will believe in things like these. I'm already an adult. It's just that I still ended up changing into the clothes she bought for me on my birthday, it's a black shirt.
You: Only a shirt? Isn't your birthday in the winter?
Osborn: That's why I fell ill after standing outside the door for two hours. I was blurry when I laid on the bed, nor I dared to sleep. When I was half awake, I saw her. She placed a wet towel on my forehead, and placed the birthday cake she brought onto the table. I've been looking at her, and I think she has probably lived a very happy life throughout the entire year. After that, I couldn't hold on anymore, so I fell asleep. In the end, it's already the next day when I woke up. I didn't manage to find that cake, so I asked Ye Chuan if he ate it. But Ye Chuan said there wasn't even any cakes to begin with. But I clearly saw it, it's such a huge cake, with a circle of blue cream on it. Also, I found a safety talisman under my pillow, whenever I was celebrating my birthday in the past, my mom would place one under my pillow.
He gestured it with his hands, looking very certain.
Osborn: Neither me or Ye Chuan could convince each other. He said that the talisman has always been there, and I insisted that he was the one that ate the cake. But so what if we knew who was right and who was wrong? She's already gone. After that, I burnt that shirt. I've never understood why she didn't want me. But it was just then, I suddenly felt very relaxed.
You: Then did you... still get in touch afterwards?
Osborn: Afterwards, she would send me a safety talisman every year. Even after I've moved, the thing is still delivered to the same place. I don't think... we kept in contact. I've only heard about some stuff about her, she's working as a reporter at the borders, and she's living a very free life. That's enough.
I once felt dejected because I didn't understand him, but now that I look at Osborn as I watch him opening the deep wounds he has, I only feel sore, as though I've swallowed a cup of spirits, that I can clearly feel the scorching pain.
You: If Ye Chuan has already adopted you, then why did you end up going to... Yu Da Academy?
When I said this phrase, my heart ached again.
Osborn only took a mouthful of beer, and spoke slowly.
Osborn: He wasn't the one who sent me in. Although I almost thought he didn't want me back then too, and was angry at him for it. But actually, besides him, everyone else thought I should be sent there, and I should be properly "educated" too. They clearly don't understand at all, but they can simply say things to decide others' lives. Those students that were sent in to Yu Da Academy are all the same as me, they are assumed to be "hopeless".
I almost immediately held onto his hand, and shook my head.
Osborn didn't say a thing, only lowering his gaze, and looked at our overlapped palms.
Osborn: Do you still remember the person in charge that helped the Strains to establish the academy that I told you in the coffee shop in the afternoon? He died in a car accident after he's out of prison.
You: I do. What's wrong?
Osborn: The car accident wasn't an accident. I did it.
I widened my eyes in surprise.
Osborn: Are you afraid? I've never been any sort of good person to begin with. I don't believe in karma, so I can only get rid of those people with my own hands.
I recalled the documents I read in the afternoon. After the person in charge was captured, he was released in only a few years.
So is that why Osborn said he doesn't believe in karma, and decided to do something on his own?
I shook my head, and held his hand even more tightly. I don't know if it's my misperception, there was an instant that his hand seemed to have trembled a little.
You: I said this just now, it's not about being good or bad.
He didn't say anything, nor I continued to speak. We only stood there quietly, looking into the distant.
The digital screen in the lobby behind us is broadcasting a rock music MV. In the image, the boy holding a red-tipped spear to battle with an evil dragon.
As the song sings, the song suddenly stopped. The boy looks towards the camera, and yelled loudly: "I'll pull your tendons out! And we'll see if you still dare to harm others!"
Osborn turned around, and looked at the screen seriously.
The red armillary sash* reflects in his clear eyes. I saw him smiling. At that instant, it feels like I've seen the helpless youth that shoulders everything onto himself.
*Red Armillary Sash, one of the weapons of Nezha.
In that night, I've heard him talking about so much of his past, but I knew that all of these are just a drop in the ocean.
I don't want to ask him about those even more gruesome things. Because I knew, it's actually not because he's unwilling to shoulder them with me, but it's because he's already leaving them behind, with no yearnings, and no turning back.
And I've finally understood, that why he's always willing to be everyone's big brother. Because there's someone that he wants to protect, that he is able to firmly walk his journey until today, and arrive me.
I don't know why I suddenly felt a strong urge to cry. Looking up, I saw a full moon.
You: Osborn, do you know that the moon is actually bitter?
Osborn: Is that so? You tasted it before?
You: I heard of a saying in the past, and I think I understand it now. Look, it's glowing in blue.
I have always thought that the color blue is the color that has most freedom, turns out that the most bitter color is blue too. And when these colors have been through the polishes of time to become the seas and the skies, that it's when we've finally realize they are actually called "tolerance".
Hearing a cry, there's suddenly something fluffy nuzzled my wrist. I got so shocked that I lowered my head, and it turns out to be the puppy I saw by the roadside in the afternoon*.
You: Osborn, look!
It looks very hungry, and it has been sniffing on the milk in my hand.
You: Here, have it.
Upon receiving permission, the puppy quickly lowered is head and began licking.
You: How obedient, how about we adopt it? It has been abandoned...
Osborn: Sure.
Osborn ruffled the puppy's head, smiling very gently. Did he see his past self from the puppy?
I tilted my head and looked at him, he's actually far much gentler than he thought.
You: Let's give it a name.
Osborn: According to the rankings, it should be named as Xiao the Sixth. But since you picked it up, you should name it.
You: Then I'll have to take my time and think of a name. I'll call it Milky for now, what do you think?
Osborn: Okay, whatever mommy says.
You: Milky, don't listen to him, call me Jiejie.
I plan to bring Milky to the vet to have its hind leg checked, then buy some basic necessities for it from the convenience store. And Osborn received a phone call, saying that he has to leave.
I waved at him by the roadside for a very, very long time, until his figure disappeared, that I kept my hand back.
I didn't notice that there's a familiar-looking youth standing from very far away from me, staring at us, and showing a confused expression.
In the next instant, he allowed himself to change into another form.
I carried the puppy, and walked towards the convenience store.
You: Let's go, we'll buy some stuff first.
The convenience store at night is empty, that even the cashier is yawning while leaning into the counter.
As soon as I walked into the convenience store, it began to rain outside.
I bought some milk and canned food for dogs, then took another umbrella. Just when I was about to make my payment, I suddenly heard footsteps from my back, and it's very close to me.
You: !
My heart clenched, and immediately turned around--
You: ... Osborn? You scared me to death!
I let out a long sigh in relief, but the puppy in my arm have instead began barking, and even began to show its fangs towards Osborn.
You: Good boy, don't you remember him anymore? It's the big brother earlier.
You (To Osborn): Why are you back?
Osborn didn't respond to me, only looking at the puppy in my arms. It's still barking.
Osborn: Do you think that it could still trust humans after it's abandoned?
You: Huh?
I'm confused, but Osborn doesn't look like he's joking at all. He stares at me very seriously, waiting for my answer.
[Choice]
Light: Yes
Night: I don't know
[Light Choice: Yes]
You: I think it probably can, well isn't Milky trusting us very much?
I patted the puppy in my arms. It has finally calmed down a little, nuzzling my palm with the tip of its nose.
You: Look, it kissed me!
[Night Choice: I don't know]
You: I don't know... I originally thought Milky trusts us very much. But it's now barking at you non-stop now, and I'm becoming a little uncertain too. Ah, could it be because its wounds hurt too much that it barked from being unable to withstand it?
Recalling that it's still injured, I quickly patted its back to comfort it. Milky has indeed became a little quiet.
I happily tilted my head up towards Osborn, but only to realize that he's still staring straight at me, and his gaze is a little weird.
You: Osborn, are you okay?
I waved before him, suddenly noticing that his clothes are drenched, sticking onto him.
You: Did you drench yourself in the rain?
Worrying that he'd catch a cold and have a fever, I quickly bought some basic medicine and a cooling patch, then took another umbrella.
You: Here, take it, don't doze off in a blur like how you did when you were a kid anymore. If you feel your body heating, then stick one of these onto your forehead, it has the same effect as a wet towel.
Osborn looks at me in a blur, there's something is flashing in his eyes, as though he's so touched he's about to cry.
Osborn: Thank you.
He took the bag from my hand, and carried them in his arms, worrying that they will be drenched by the rain.
You: What's wrong? Why are you suddenly coming back to look for me, didn't you have something up?
He didn't answer, only to run away in a hurry.
You: How odd.
Perhaps he was feeling at a trance after mentioning too much of his past.
I simply made my guess without overthinking it, carrying my stuff, and left the convenience store.
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